I was out to dinner with family recently. The pizza arrived at our table, extremely thin and smaller than any of us expected. My dad, having only eaten two slices, ordered dessert- an uncharacteristic move. “Somebody’s gotta be over the top,” he rationalized.
Following in his steps, my theme for 2019 is Make It A Monumental Year. Make it The Best Year Ever.
Before starting on my big road trip, I thought, even if I don’t do anything else noteworthy, even if I hate my life afterward, at least I’ll have done something that I wanted to do, and I’ll have the memories. Now, after making one bold move, there’s no way I could settle for a milquetoast existence.
I’ve lined up some adventures near the beginning of the year- sports like mountain biking that I’ve never tried and am a little afraid to try. Mainly, these activities are in place to provide a sense of accomplishment. Even if I’m horrible at it and hate everything about it, I participated in something I was curious about, and now I can check it off my list.
More importantly, my hope and intention is to be more honest, to make inspirational choices and fearless decisions. In some cases, it’s enough to make a decision, period. Indecision leads to inaction, which leads to a waste of life. Lately, when I cannot decide, I leave the answer up to chance. I write all the options I can think of on little slips of paper, mix them up in a container, then pick one and stick with it. With an answer, any answer, I can move forward. [One slip of paper usually says “something else,” to leave room for a better option I didn’t think of. So far, I have never picked that wild card.]
I’m not a fan of sharing goals in advance because I can’t trust myself to treat my personal ambitions as serious objectives. Instead of motivating me to work harder, I just end up feeling inadequate when I fail to reach the goals I broadcast. But I’m all about getting real this year, so I’ll tell you.
I wanted to pick one measurable goal. I couldn’t decide. Should I write a song, record it, and post it on YouTube? Should I work toward making a living as a full time blogger? I wrote down all the options that grabbed my interest (plus ‘Something Else’) and blindly picked a slip of paper.
The answer said to write one poem a week. I felt deflated. Now, after having chosen it, it sounded so insignificant. I sat with my choice for a while, though, and realized that it will probably help incorporate writing into my lifestyle as more of a routine, no matter what else is going on. I think it will help me build an important foundation. Plus, even though writing poetry and song lyrics is agonizing, painfully slow work, and even though the results are usually abysmal, the process is ultimately more satisfying than writing prose. It’s more challenging, and I like being in the headspace of no limitations. I’ve missed it. There’s no expectation for the quality of results of this experiment- they could be trash. Guess what? You are going to get to read them!
I figure the worst thing that can happen is I fall short of the goal and then I have to try making 2020 The Best Year Ever. That doesn’t sound so bad.
Whatever your goal is for the new year, or whatever your lack of goals, I hope 2019 treats you well. And I hope you treat it well, too.
